My You-Plural

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all!

Incidentally, I'm starting to come around on the various plurals of "you." Incorrect though they may be, they do add efficiency. I actually prefer "yous" to "y'all," but for some reason it sounds a little awkward to end a sentence with it (though even if one were wishing a singular person a happy holiday, one wouldn't put "you" after a direct address comma to conclude the benediction).

So here's what I propose (and I know it's complicated, but so is the rest of our language):

1) When ending a sentence addressed to a group, a folksy Southern "y'all" is correct.
e.g.) "Happy Thanksgiving, y'all"
2) In the middle of the sentence, a hearty Northeastern "yous" is correct.
e.g.) "What do yous want?"
3) When beginning a sentence, "y'all" is correct, unless addressing a named group of people, in which case "yous" becomes the modifier.
e.g.) "Y'all come back now!" and "Y'all want some lemonade?" as opposed to "Yous guys are good people" or "Yous congressional leaders need to stop acting like children."

So...what do yous readers think?

I really want to know how this story works out. A couple college kids refused to pay an automatically added gratuity at a restaurant which provided terrible service. Now it's going to trial as a criminal case.

Personally, I'm rooting for the kids. Any lawyers out there think they have a case? Or don't? I'd content the automatic addition of a gratuity for service constitutes a promise by the establishment to provide acceptable service, a promise the students acted upon in good faith by ordering off the menu in a group of 6 or more as clearly stated. If the establishment didn't follow through, the students shouldn't still be on the hook for services rendered--or in this case, not rendered.

Trivia Time Answered

Not that anybody cares, but here's the answer to what I thought was a pretty awesome trivia question.

Q: What do the following people all have in common?: Meg Ryan, Tim Curry, Ed Asner, John Ratzenberger, Jeff Goldblum, Martin Sheen, Sting

A: They all voiced recurring Captain Planet villains.

True story. Bust that one out next time you're at a party.

Any Catholics out there want to stick up for this one? The Church really has its priorities out of whack...it seems they have lost all ability to do cost-benefit analysis, and are perennially willing to stand by as large tragedies happen in order to avoid smaller ones.

Trivia Time

What do the following people all have in common?:

Meg Ryan
Tim Curry
Ed Asner
John Ratzenberger
Jeff Goldblum
Martin Sheen
Sting

(Also, though less famous: Maurice LaMarche, Frank Welker, David Warner)